Here’s something I’ve noticed: So many people, especially women, behave as if they can’t do something if they aren’t doing it with someone. While desiring companionship is wonderful, it also creates a sense of fear when it comes to traveling alone.
Solo traveling does NOT mean you’re alone.
Solo traveling, or independent traveling, just means that you’re in control of your time. Here is what I propose:
Reframe How You Think About Being Alone
In our culture, loneliness seems to have ties to self-worth. When we feel really isolated, we seem to think that we’re less-than. We get all wrapped up inside of our heads thinking that because we’re alone, nobody wants to be with us. Loneliness makes us feel undesirable.
I’m writing this during Corona, and I can see loneliness changing people. We are being left to feel our grief and anxiety and confusion alone in our living rooms. We feel alone in the world, so we reach out to technology to connect us. We Zoom to talk about our feelings, and we feel validated by group messages.
When I say ‘our culture’ I mean you. I mean the folks who turn to the internet for conversation. It’s not a bad thing. It just means that we’re all out here, feeling connected all of the time. It helps us to combat our loneliness.
Then the question becomes, even if we’re alone, are we really, you know, alone?
There is a difference between solitude, loneliness, and being alone.
It can be super difficult to be alone. Heck, even I’m guilty of taking my phone into the bathroom with me. Why do I need to be connected in the bathroom?
I don’t, but I am.
I encourage you to play with solitude.
Get to know yourself by being alone. Even sit in loneliness for a while. It might not be hard during Corona, but it might also be super hard since we’re now more attached to our phones than ever before.
You can become stronger through loneliness.
And, here’s the thing. When it comes to traveling solo, I rarely feel lonely. In fact, I’m rarely alone.
Not only that but the more that I’m alone, the more I come into myself; I find my center. I become friends with my solitude. We’re tight. We challenge each other. Together, my solitude, my independence, my fears, my travels, and I become stronger. We move each other forward.
We don’t hold each other back – we’re travelers.
